POSTED BY JILL MARTIN
I’ve struggled with vulnerability for a long time. My corporate background dictated that showing emotion - other than anger or frustration - was a sign of weakness. In my childhood, I learned early that showing vulnerability made you an easy target - letting children know the pain they caused, trained them which buttons to press.
My call to really work on showing vulnerability came very recently from a friendship which started in an unusual way, but which gave me an intense desire to ‘bare my soul’ – to finally be seen for who I really am. (Thank you for igniting this in me – you know who you are).
I began working with vulnerability to connect to my feminine essence. Although, the fact that it’s feminine is irrelevant. The point is that connecting to my vulnerability connected me to the deepest, most raw part of me – who I really am. When I'm vulnerable there is no place for any of my masks. In my essence I am scared, open, honest, true, sometimes child-like and sometimes fierce, heartfelt, full of love, and always ready to receive it.
I am unashamedly real.
And in my realness I am most able to reach and connect with others.
I have come to learn that my vulnerability is my power. When I take a deep breath and show it, magic happens: hearts crack open, compassion and empathy flow, support shows up, people are moved, relationships build.
I now understand that strength and power don't have to be hard or forceful. When bound in vulnerability, they become fluid and penetrating, and reach deep inside people. They impact people from within - at heart and soul level, not by pushing from the outside.
And vulnerability requires courage. Immense courage. It’s exposing and revealing in its nature. It requires me to show my true self - in all my emotional nakedness – the light and dark.
Vulnerability is not about crying and showing I'm upset (although it can be). It’s simply about being brave enough to bare my soul. It’s about saying what’s real to me: What causes me pain. What I want. What I love. How I feel… even when it means I may be rejected or ridiculed.
It’s also a choice - a step or a leap to take when I feel myself closing up, shrinking or protecting.
And I'm glad to say it's becoming a habit - a way of being.
I don’t pretend it’s always easy. But I’m finding it’s worth it. In exposing myself I’ve found I’ve gained greater confidence and belief in myself, and liberation from the masks I’ve worn for more years than I wish to number. I care less about the reaction I get, and more about being true to my essence.
I am stronger. I am more liberated. I am more loved.
My call to you – be vulnerable. Be brave in showing yourself, and in saying what you want…. And watch the magic happen.
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